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Lots of people have been asking for commissions lately, but I'm afraid I can only take on a handful of "full" commissions during the spare moments I have between project work.
I want to try something out, though, to see if I can't provide for a few more fans.
I'm going to make available 10 slots on a quickfire sketch list. Each slot will cost £10GBP. For that, I'll produce a (single character) digital image on par with the pic of Scarlet at the bottom of this journal entry. All you have to do is let me know what you want drawn, providing reference where possible.

Should you want to be on this quickfire list, just submit a comment below, reading "Add me to the list".
First come, first served.
I'll contact applicants in sequence to discuss what you're after.
If you do not respond to my note within 24 hours or if you change your mind, I'll move on to the next person on the list (so if you're the 11th applicant, there's still a chance you might get in on this).

This is just a test and will not impact on any existing projects or commissions.
If successful, I'll do more of them in the future.

Some little ball of faecal matter posted a comment on my profile, proudly announcing “Tom Preston finally left DA”, no doubt in an effort to stir something up.

Now, I don’t know a huge amount about Tom Preston (AKA Andrew Dobson), I’m just aware of the sketchy details: he drew fetish stuff, he tried to deny it, he posted some incendiary journal entries and some people claim his art is no good.
Excluding the denial part, that sounds eerily familiar to my online shtick. The only difference seems to be in our approach to faceless internet hate. Where TP appears to have taken it very, very personally, thus fanning the flames, I treated mine for what it was: faceless.

That’s the first thing you should always remember when reading through comments about your work: everybody is a phantom. An avatar with a silly name. Their comments could be good, their comments could be bad, but ultimately, unless you’re certain the individual behind them has some influence over your future, the words only have as much meaning as you yourself give them.

I love positive feedback. It’s an indicator that I’m providing what people want to see. But, at the same time, I like negative feedback. Especially irrational hatred, though I don’t receive it nearly as much as I once did. The more absurd someone is and the more petty their argument, the more fun I can have with it. It’s ammunition. A catalyst for more cartoons, tailored just to spite them. They try to turn them back on me, of course, branding them as “strawmen”, but that’s just another word issued by a faceless heckler. I now have a visual that will forever stand there, simultaneously staring them down and, with my name plastered all over it, bolstering my online presence. People share it around when similar topics are discussed elsewhere. It spreads while the detractor’s anonymous bile is lost and forgotten.

Of course, that success is entirely dependent on you following the second key guideline: don’t be a dick.
The internet has a memory. If you don’t want something to be known by all, then don’t post it. If you have an opinion, make it as bullet-proof as possible, and unless they have proven themselves unworthy of it: treat people with respect.
You don’t do that and it will be you providing ammunition to potential haters, rather than the other way ‘round.

Run when you really need to, sure, but never let yourself be chased from a favoured internet haunt because some impotent nobodies said bad things about you and your work. Face them down with your art. Bombard them with it. Show that you’re here to f**king stay and there’s not a god-damn thing they can do about it.

Watch any kind of Bear-Grylls-let’s-drink-some-tasty-urine survival show on TV and the pee-swilling host will invarably bring up the matter of humans detaching and distancing themselves from the source of their food. Namely the farms and slaughter houses.
As with anything in the first world: if we can pay people to do it for us, we do. There’s nothing wrong with this, nor is there anything wrong with electing to hunt down your own food.
There is, however, something very wrong with hunting down and killing an animal just for the sake of it, be it a common deer or something more exotic:…

“Hunting is a legitimate sport!” Some people will no doubt cry, while stroking their favourite firearm.
No. It’s not.
Waiting for an animal to wander over to the bait you laid out for it so you can shoot it in its dumb face with a ranged weapon from your beer-can littered sitting position will NEVER be a “sport”.
“We can’t forget our hunter/gatherer roots!” is usually the next thing they throw out there, which is as bull-sh*t an argument as the previous one.
If you stalked the thing and took it out at close quarters with a knife, OK, yeah, that’d be a display of skill and physical prowess on par with the ancestors you’re supposedly venerating. You’d be facing the same hardship and desperation as they did, and it would make you appreciate just how easy we have things in this modern world.
But you’re not doing that, are ya?
What you’re doing is playing the FPS of life in God Mode. All so you can say that you, for no reason other than psychotic blood-lust, killed something that had a bigger dick than yours.

Well done, Walter. You killed an animal that would normally have run away from a human. You brave, nobel hunter.
The Chloe statues, modelled by the talented :icontexelion: are now available in 3 different sizes via Shapeways.

Should you be interested on one, just follow the links found here: Chloe Available on Shapeways by Texelion
When I was at the London Super Comic Con back in March, a few people brought me some cool gift art which I had been meaning to show off here on DA. I kept getting sidetracked, but now that I finally have a moment:

Thanks so much!
OK, numerous people have done this and I'm not trying to get at any one individual by bringing it up. I know you lovely people are just being polite, maybe even a bit timid (dunno why. There’s only been one fatality during correspondence with me. And in all fairness it was their fault for holding the aubergine incorrectly), but if you have a question you want to pose me: just ask it. Don't send me a message or note reading only "can I ask you a question?". The answer is always going to be "Yes. I'd be delighted to answer your question as best I can. Please; fire away", which is a waste of both our time.
I love answering questions.
I hate wasting time.
Waste my time and….well…..there will be aubergines.

Well, we’ve all seen the trailers now. Watching the current WB/DC “We must catch up with Marvel” cinematic universe gradually be revealed is like watching a car crash in slow motion.
Obviously we need to actually watch Batman v Superman and Suicide Squad before final judgement can be passed, but the trailers make one thing fairly clear: the casting is terrible and the world being presented is just…..ugly. Not deliberately so, in the way that many depictions of Gotham’s backstreets has been rendered by people with an actual flare for imagery; I mean it’s uuuuugly. Urban decay has a macabre charm. What we’re seeing here is just a charisma-free mess…..of which the walking, talking embodiment is that new “Joker”.
When it was first announced that Jared Leto was playing the role, I looked the guy up. He struck me as your run-of-the-mill, bland, Hollywood pretty-boy. The kind of blank canvas you actually need to paint a character as big as The Joker. Unfortunately, the artist obviously doesn’t know what The Joker looks like, because they’ve given us Keith f**king Flint.

The latest Bats v Supes trailer also shows us Jesse Eisenberg’s Lex Luthor for the first time.
A lot of people were saying “wait and see” and pointing toward the “Attention” monologue from The Social Network. Well, I waited and now I’ve seen it, and if that “The Red Capes are coming!” line in the trailer is the example they chose to try and get us hyped, god knows how devoid of personality the lesser parts of his performance will be.
I posted a picture of Lex Luthor from the comics when Eisenberg’s casting was first announced, and I’m going to post it here again. Take a good look:

Now I shall pose one question: Why the f**k wasn’t Ben Affleck cast as Lex Luthor?
His performance in Runner Runner was PURE Luthor: a charming villain who lures everyone over to his side so that he can manipulate them into doing what he needs them to.
We could have had that…..but we’re getting Eisenberg: An actor only really suited to providing the default voice on a SatNav.

My ideal casting for the WB/DC universe, as we thus far know it, would have been:

Henry Cavill as Superman (I guess it kinda worked in Man of Steel. I can’t think of any better options. Weirdly, he looks more like Superman in The Man From UNCLE than he does in either of the DC movies!)

Jeffrey Dean Morgan as Batman (I’ve said it before. He’d have made a great, grizzled Batman)

Ben Affleck as Lex Luthor (As said above)

Gina Carano as Wonder Woman (This was a no-brainer. She looks the part! Instead they ran with that twig-with-lips, Gal Gadot)


Michael Emerson as The Joker (He actually voiced The Joker in The Dark Knight Returns, and a more mature Joker would go well with a veteran Batman. Just give him a prosthetic nose and a purple suit)
A teaser for the new DangerMouse cartoon surfaced yesterday.…

Though obviously aimed at those disgusting little things we call “children” (it is a product of CBBC), I do rather like the look of it. Primarily because it’s an actual cartoon rather than some cheaply knocked-together 3D CG monstrosity (Inspector Gadget).
Comedian Alexander Armstrong is taking over as the voice of the diminutive super-spy.

The decidedly 21st century Sherlock is jumping back to the past in some sort of one-shot special, coming soon….ish.

No, really: "ish". That’s what they’re telling us:…

As a fan of Victoriana, I’m quite looking forward to it, despite the presence of the damn hat and pipe. Though obviously expensive to do, I always think adaptations of stories work better if set in the correct time period. How much better would War of the Worlds (2005) would have been if set in 1900? Keep the setting American, sure, but put Tom Cruise in a little tweed suit and have the Martians marching over Victorian New York. Instantly a better film.
I’m of the opinion that a return to more classical imagery will do wonders for Sherlock.

Woah. I didn’t see THIS coming!…

I’ve only ever played one Lego game and it was horrible. When it wasn’t being mind-numbingly tedious it was being hair-pullingly obscure. The reason I bought it, though, was the same reason I’m looking with a degree of lust at Lego Dimensions: the characters. The mere concept of seeing The Doctor and Emmett Brown together on screen, albeit in Lego form, has my inner child shrieking “TAKE MY GOD-DAMN MONEY!” and it’s going to take a great deal of willpower not to purchase the title.

Also, the teaser for Doctor Who series 9 dropped yesterday:…

Now, who is that Stark-sprog at the end? A Young River? Or someone from the distant past?

How acceptable, modern gaming conventions would have ruined classics:

Downloadable content:

Quick Time Events:



Arkham Knight
is a Rocksteady game, and it wouldn’t be a Rocksteady game without some utterly abysmal design decisions that make you wonder how certain people within the studio both keep a job and make it home each day without gamers, deranged by the frustration Rocksteady’s titles have generated, brutally murdering them.

In Arkham Asylum it was the terrible boss fights, particularly the Ivy one.
In Arkham City it was the Riddler death traps that you continuously encountered before you had the right equipment to deal with them. A problem if, like me, you actually wanted to PLAY the game and you have the hints turned off, because you’re never informed that what you’re trying to achieve is impossible. You’re running on the assumption that the game is actually well-designed and that you wouldn’t be duped into thinking you can accomplish something that you cannot.
In Arkham Knight, it’s the presence of the Batmobile.

Now, there are certain types of game that I am flat out bad at. Racing games, for example. I’m terrible at them, which means I don’t enjoy playing them. I just get angrier and angrier if I try. So, what do I do? I don’t play them. I play things I AM good at, things that I DO enjoy… stealth/action games. Things like the Arkham series.
What are we forced to do in Arkham Knight?
F**k you, Rocksteady. F**k you right in the f**king f**k.
I knew those lazy bastards would do that as soon as the Batmobile was mentioned. As soon as you introduce a vehicle, a hack designer will shoehorn in a race. It’s guaranteed.
Here’s a little tip for any studio head: from this point on, should one of your designers put down on paper “Get from point A to point B as fast as possible” within the design document of any project that is NOT overtly a racing game; fire them. You’re paying them to be creative and they’re not.

Arkham Asylum is, without a doubt, the best of the series, and the best Batman game out there, but Arkham City and Arkham Knight prove Rocksteady didn’t actually know why: it was small, it was focused and it felt complete.
I could, and have, played Arkham Asylum again and again, because it feels like an episode from the animated series (probably because of Paul Dini’s contribution). It’s a great ride, with a fantastic opening, a great setting and a sense of closure in completing it (even if you did have to wade through a badly designed boss-battle to reach it). It feels very “Batman”.

Everything starts to go down hill with Arkham City: it started making things too big, too flabby and key elements of the plot required you know more about Batman lore than you should. There’s a difference between adding something for the fans, as they did in Arkham Asylum, and what we see in Arkham City, and later in Arkham Knight. Who are these suddenly prominent characters who have had no introduction? Why is their reveal supposed to be shocking? Didn’t read the comics? Then you’ll never know.
Bad storytelling.
Terrible world building.
Had they set Arkham City across a couple of blocks of Gotham and just focused on Batman dealing with a turf war between 2 Face and The Penguin: that would have been ace. But instead we get Ra’s Al Ghul randomly showing up, Lazarus pits, Frankengrundy and a weird plan to kill everyone in the super-jail using missiles (If the inmates rely on food from the guards, why not just poison it? If everyone had to go through processing before being dumped in there, why not inject them with something THEN? Why missiles?! Who planned that protocol? Michael Bay?!).
After THAT nonsense, Arkham Knight goes completely off the map by flat-out bringing the apocalypse to Gotham. Batman is just a guy in a cape! He tracks bad guys down and punches them in the face. That’s what he does, that’s why we like him. Dealing with crap of this magnitude is Superman’s shtick, and that f**ker doesn’t even show up in Arkham Knight, despite being mentioned!
Gotham gets covered in a toxic cloud. What do you want Batman to do? Punch it?
As soon as hero duties start being delegated to more capable parties, it stops being a Batman game.
If you want to make a Batman game, come up with a scenario that Batman can believably deal with!

DLC is the final nail in the coffin. Initials seem to raise red flags these days. Games with QTEs don’t actually contain gameplay, and games with DLC generally feel incomplete or unfinished. Arkham Knight’s conclusion, even if you went to the trouble of activating Knightfall in full, doesn’t bring any kind of satisfaction. Arkham Asylum may have ended with Batman flying off to deal with a 2 Face bank robbery, but that felt like a conclusion to the story! Arkham Asylum was over. Done. Dusted. You had turned the last page.
Arkham Knight doesn’t feel like it has a last page. It feels like the last page has been torn out and Rocksteady is holding it hostage until you pay them more money, further poisoning the experience.

The Arkham series has gone from shining example of how to do a licensed game right to a fine demonstration of a corporate money-grab.

All the entries can be seen here:
But the winners are as follows.....
(This was really, really, really hard)
Drumroll, please.

Runners up:


Ollashiro: Love Triangle by ollashiro

Miss-Dutch: 10 Years Sequential Art Entry by Miss-Dutch

Ritualist: Jollyjack art contest by Ritualist

Ksterstone: ::Call Us Beep Us:: by Ksterstone

Harveydentmustdie: Sequential art - Tribute by HarveyDentMustDie

Louizu: Sequential Max : Furry Road by Louizu

Rabbitmaskedman: Sequential Art by rabbitmaskedman

Kawa-V: 10 Years Of Sequential Art by Kawa-V

Hanimetion: SAC entry - Art block by Hanimetion

Best Art:

Whose name I think I got wrong in that earlier video. I do apologise!
Bounty of the Slaughtermaster (Sequential Art) by Mark-MrHiDE-Patten

Funniest image:

”I came to say I’m sorry……and to kill you”
That line just made me laugh :D
j.j. by Marisa (sister) by HamHunterX3
It’s been a while since I’ve felt I could recommend any output from the BBC, given their tendency to axe shows that I’m enjoying (EG: Ripper Street), but a rather splendid series has just concluded that fans of magic and period drama will no doubt enjoy as much as I did.

Jonathan Strange & Mr Norrell is set during the Napoleonic era and follows the titular characters as they attempt, and succeed, in the resurrection of English magic. With arguments over what kind of magic is “respectable”, deals with rogue fairies, murder, conspiracy, and the employment of magic in the fight against the French; these two magicians gradually become enemies.
It’s apparently adapted from a book, but I don’t have time to read much fiction these days, so its appearance was a surprise and delight!
I shall say no more. To do so would spoil it. It’s well worth a watch.…

Legendary actor, Christopher Lee, has died at the age of 93.…

Though the man starred in epic film franchises, like Star Wars and The Lord of the Rings, he was always associated with Hammer Horror. Specifically, Dracula, whom he played on numerous occasions. The Hammer connection led to him being given roles in many of Tim Burton’s movies; Burton being a die hard fan of the style and genre.

Having generally been the bad-ass face (and voice!) of super-villainy for 50 years, the British had no choice but to knight him, and he became Sir Christopher Lee in 2009.

Now that I have calmed down; here are my thoughts.


Fallout 4 Trailer

My webcomic, Sequential Art, is 10 years old. I started it back in June 2005.
As a little celebration, I thought I’d run a contest (something I’d actually been meaning to do for a while).

It’s fairly straightforward. There will be two top prizes, each awarded to the best of the following: The best image (best art wins. Simple) and the funniest image (Art quality isn’t as important as the idea behind it).
To be in with a chance of winning, all you need do is draw something related to the Sequential Art webcomic. It could be a single character, multiple characters, your own strip, anything. Draw it and post a link to it in the comments section of this journal.

First prize for each of the two categories is:
A copy of Sequential Art Volume 4
A print of the 10 year image (seen below)
A free commission (colour. Single character)

There will also be 10 runners up (total), each of whom will be sent a print of the 10 year image.

Rules and guidelines:

Closing date is June 30th 2015

You can submit as many entries as you like, but don’t spam the same image.

All entries must be family friendly. If it’s not the kind of thing you’d see in the SA strip, it’s not the kind of thing that will win.

You can involve your own characters if you want, but if I’m unfamiliar with them or if you’re using an in-joke that I’m unaware of, it’ll probably hurt your chances.

Colouring in one of my B&W images or tracing something that I (or anyone else) has done in the past has zero chance of winning.