EjaculationThat got your attention Now who dares click the link?http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Z99xbwrFWocAhhh, language.
Tomb RaidedCompleted Tomb Raider. It does become slightly more player-friendly as it progresses, but it's too little too late. I really do think this title is made up of EVERYTHING that is wrong with games at the moment: it rides on an old title that it really has nothing to do with, it leads you round by the nose, it relies on dull collectable items for longevity, it thinks "maturity" means everything must be caked in gore, it's wracked through with quick-time-events and it ignores that ALL of these points have been failings of a zillion other titles over the last 10 years, leaving the developers no reason other that sheer lack of talent, imagination or common sense for their inclusion!!Where's my pen? I'm "How To Playing" this bitch.....Might even "Zorro Perforation" it......
The End of the Twinkie?http://www.usatoday.com/story/money/business/2012/11/16/hostess-twinkies-ding-dongs-wonder-bread-going-out-of-business/1708409/World War 3 may just be months away, with much of the middle east currently being blown apart by missiles and the locals setting their neighbours on fire, but the real news is that the Twinkie, the USA's primary contribution to world cuisine, could cease to be."You eat those?" I hear people ask. Hell no. Never eaten one in my life. There's something about their unnatural, chemical-yellow colour and that they have a half-life rather than a use-by date that just sets off one too many alarm-bells.In fact, I'm pretty sure that if you read the print on the pack, you'll find asbestos to be a key ingredient.Even John McClane can't keep one down, and he took out a building full of terrorists with nothing but his bare feet and a Santa hat.Which leads to my point: Without the Twinkie, there are SO many lines from SO many classic movies that future generations just a
Silent Hill: RevelationWow. And I thought the first Silent Hill film missed the point.I was surprised that a sequel was made at all, given the rather poor narrative (and acting. That kid was almost as bad as the brat from Phantom Menace) of the first movie, but in comparison with Revelation, it was positively Shakespearian.If there's a third film in the franchise, I'll be amazed (to a point. We have had, what is it, 5 Resident Evil films, now?)How hard is it to wrap your head around the concept, Film-Makers? Silent Hill has no face, it has no agenda, it's just an evil f**king mirror that reflects your personal demons. It's the perfect vehicle to use different actors to tell different stories with each and every film. It's potentially the James Bond of horror set-ups. Play it right and you could get 50 films out of it, easy.You devolve it into a generic, fun-fair, ghost-train and you're pissing away the concept with such force you blow a hole in the lavatory wall.
Now I have a machine gun. Ho Ho Ho.You know what I've always felt Christmas eve lacks?Paranoia and a sense of impending doom.The "party game" I just picked up should do the trick.Each player gets a Nerf gun, the name of a target and the location in the house where they have to shoot them at some point over the course of the evening.Nothing says "Christmas" like an assassination contract......yes. I have been playing Hitman too long.
I'm changing my name.That's right. I'm changing my DA name.I've thought long and hard and have decided to change it toooooo.........................................."jollyjack".That's right; i'm one of the few artists here on DA that seems content with my name. That; and I think changing a "brand" simply because you can, after you've spent time and energy building up an audience is f**king stupid.I've been here for years. I've operated on the internet under "jollyjack" for longer. If I changed that now it would be monumentally confusing to people that follow my work, which, in turn, would have an effect on revenue.There are a ton of artists here whose work I keenly follow, and I think they're kinda shooting themselves in the foot by doing this.Kinda reminds be of those little label-making things everyone's been given on at least one Christmas as a kid: you unwrap it, you find out what it does and you spend the rest of the day punching out new tags for everything. Even if they'
You know what your D'n'D game needs? Penguins.A little something a talented cohort of mine has been working on: http://www.pureevilminiatures.com/realm-of-lorcraft.htmlEver since "Lorcraft" cropped up in Sequential Art, I've been working on an RPG system for an actual, pen-and-paper Lorcraft game and have a few really good ideas that should (in theory) work.It's a ways off yet, though. It's the kind of thing that'll need some serious playtesting, and I have a zillion other projects to conclude first (LITTLEVICTORYLITTLEVICTORYLITTLEVICTORY!)
Strange and exotic foods.The USA is the loudest nation on Earth. Its culture is presented to the rest of the planet in all forms of media, and has been for the decades that I've been parked in front of the TV. Kids in remote corners of the world grow up watching Sesame Street. I did, and as a result say "Zee" instead of "Zed", which pissed off my English teacher something fierce.For those that take my jibes, barbs and sarcasm too seriously: I have no problem with that kind of cultural permeation. Far from it. I find it rather fascinating.It has however led to a few "WTF?" moments. Questions as to what those crazy Yanks are talking about, as there is nothing comparable elsewhere. They're never in regards to anything major. Just little cultural quirks that have never escaped beyond the borders and, as such, are seen by outsiders as a total f**king mystery.Things like "S'mores"."S'more" is a word I've heard and read since the 80s."Let's make S'mores""Can we have S'mores?"What the hell are you people talkin
Rockstar do it again......regrettably.Red Dead Redemption: Undead Nightmare was fun. Lots of fun. It was also, obviously, a total fluke, because the main Red Dead game was irritating, LA Noir felt dull and empty, GTA 4 was a chore to play and now GTA 5 is loaded with even more trademark Rockstar rage-quit-inducing pleasantries.With that track record, you'd think a person of (at least) average intelligence, like me, would have steered clear of the game.I did not.Lets see what I've done in San Andreas today: I've not shot any Elk because of the insta-death mountain lions, I've driven off a foot high cliff and exploded in a manner that would suggest the chassis of crappy rust bucket I was driving had been crafted from uranium, I've been knocked over in the road and then continuously mown down by other vehicles until dead, I've watched the player-character casually start walking around a vehicle to enter it despite the urgency implied by both my hammering of the control pad and the sh*tloa
Apparently I hit a sore spot.The news that I might one day return to the internet apparently isn't going over well.Sent by "Schlomo G."E-mail: email@example.comCan you stop being a whiney attention whore for once in your life, and quit relying on 12-15 year-old kids on a public art site to validate your existence (that's all your DA post was. Don't kid yourself thinking it was meant to be something else)? Your art hasn't gotten any better since your hiatus, and instead of trying to improve it you either sick your fans to give you attention or tell them to attack your mean bullies. Your Brental Floss strips are getting uglier each time you churn one out, and to add insult to injury, you, Brent, and Dan can't tell a joke (People on ED edit your strips to make funnier jokes. Let this sink in your head for a while). Apparently you learned nothing from your "hiatus" after seeing that DA blog, as I'm trying to figure out how each Brental strip keeps getting uglier because that's the only comic you're fo
The Hobbit: An Unexpected JourneySaw The Hobbit last night. It was very good... if a bit long. Don't get me wrong, I'm all for seeing all the little details interconnecting The Hobbit to Lord of the Rings and all that, but for the average watcher... eh... it kinda dragged. I overheard several people saying they fell asleep during the film, and I noticed more than once a number of people fidgeting and looking at their watches. Still, it's a damn fine movie and It's a shame we have to wait so long for the next two films.Having The Hobbit being written during the beginning of Lord of the Rings is pretty smart. You could effectively watch the 3 Hobbit movies and then immediately move right into the 3 Lord of the Rings movies. Kudos to Jackson for that, it'll be great to marathon run the two trilogies back to back.This movie was, like the book, much lighter and funnier than The Lord of the Rings and I was surprised at how much from the books they actually kept. They
Small UpdateI've been gone from the internet for almost 2 1/2 months now, and chances are I won't be coming back for quite a while longer. Nevertheless I just wanted to give a quick update and thank all my fans who have been so supportive of me these past few weeks/months.I've been amazed at the number of genuine well wishes that I've received. I think the vast majority of my fans genuinely do enjoy my doodles and cartoons and that the well organized and extremely vocal "haters" of me and my work make up a very very VERY small percentage of my watchers. There have been some absolutely wonderful comments and messages being sent my way, and several of you have even sent me links to advice sites or inspirational posts. I truly do appreciate it. Thank you so very much.I don't say Thank You enough, I think. Because of my fans I've been able to do some amazing things and I owe you guys a lot. Because of you'all, I've been able to visit another country and make friends from all over the world, somethin
For your crimes....I spent the weekend playing through Saints Row 4. The full 20 Hour campaign.My penance for such indulgence?Gardening."What kind of punishment is that?" some may ask. Gardening is supposedly therapeutic.Not my garden.Venturing out there is a bit like playing Jumanji.Where's that machete?......are those drums?
Bell$ and Whi$tle$You remember when mobile phones used to just do one thing: be a phone? Then they could text. Then they could take photos. Then they could connect to the internet.People pay hundreds for the latest iPhone, which does a ton of things on top of being a phone, and which is why I DON'T OWN ONE!I carry a phone because I might need to make a call.Don't think that I'm some sort of Luddite that takes offence at all the bells and whistles they bolt onto the little boxes. I'm not. I just have no use for them, and so, I don't want to pay for them.I can go into my local phone emporium and pick up a device that is a phone and only a phone for £19.99 (or even less!). No camera, no internet access, just a crappy little green screen that displays a number.It's a phone, nothing more.Which brings me to the next generation of consoles.As far back as I have desired them, they have cost around the £100 – £200 mark at launch, even when they started doing things they didn't need to, like play DVDs/Blue
Creativity is addictive.http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-23572742I believe that Minecraft is the future of massive multiplayer games, and I'm surprised that none of the big developers/publishers have cottoned onto it yet.They look at Minecraft and think its success is down to its business model, or to its blocky, retro charm.It's not.It's down to the fact that you get out of it what you put into it.With a MMORPG, there are pre-scripted quests. With Minecraft, you set the quests yourself or others.User created content is the key. All you have to do is provide the players with the tools to build.There are two types of gamer: wall builders and wall breakers.Wall builders are the ones that spend an age in an RTS game getting their base just right. They play SimCity and act as Dungeon Master during an RPG.Wall breakers are the type to follow the mission brief. They get set a quest and they follow it. They're the Call of Duty crowd and they're never more happy than when
BatmathI enjoyed the Nolanverse Batman films a lot, but I've just run the numbers:Bruce trained for 7 years (Alfred mentions his absence in Batman Begins) and he sulked for 8 years between Dark Knight and Dark Knight Rises. Between that, and including the short time in Dark Knight Rises in which he wore the cowl, Nolanverse Bruce was only Batman for about a year, tops (Joker's line "Let's rewind a year" tells us this).One. F**king. Year."Caped Crusader" the Nolanverse Batman is not. He is "Bat Temp".
Regarding the Boston Marathon BombingI've tried to write this journal a few times, but I am having trouble finding words.I live in Massachusetts, so Boston is "my home" when I travel and the city that I most strongly associate with myself. I'm mad. I don't know how to feel about things like this other than to be mad. In an age of immediate and 24 news, it's hard to not know who or why, and endlessly frustrating to watch people fight and blame without any factual information.I do love the quote from Fred Rogers that has been going around. But I also think about the words of people like George Carlin. Is this just how we live now? I feel like people my age, who were teens during 9/11, live our lives just assuming that any and every day there's a chance we could be violently and senselessly killed by a random act of violence. Does that mean that the people who do these things have succeeded?It's aggr
Tip of the Day: ComparingDon't compare your life to others. See what others are doing but the best person to compare yourself to is you.If I always compared myself to others and wanted to constantly compete or beat others, I wouldn't want to share what I know.Everyone is on their own journey but together we can get further and faster.Have a great Monday!Sending positive vibes to you allBobby
TYPOGRAPHYlove========================:iconfancystupidfoxplz: Happy New Year! Wish you all much happiness, adventure and knowledge in 2012! ========================FEATURED: Typography There is something about typography that is just awesome. The combination, use and placement of words/language is something we see in everyday design and should be appreciated as an art form. So to spread the love of Typography, here are some amazing typographic pieces you should all check out: :thumb23234837: :thumb166787426: Typography 2 Typeface by dRoop Evolution of Typography by SilverThornz :thumb105099481: typography diseases 3 by chuckTHEchick Got a Light by DesertViper I emotion you Typography by il6amo7a-Q8 Typography Desktop by BlackHug Hello Monday by DrewDahlman More on Typography Comic Sans Criminal: http://www.comicsanscriminal.com/ We Love Typography: http://welo
My Minecraft Testificate InfestationIn Minecraft there are these squidward like villagers called Testificates. In a recent update they were given new abilities such as having babies to repopulating a town based on the number of houses there are. Since the requirement for a "house" is simply a room with a roof and a door, I decided to spend my time building a massive city for the Testificates to populate, using a generated village as a starting point.After building a number of houses, I began noticing the little children running wild and there becoming quite a LOT of villagers. I undertook a huge task of building a BIG open area underground with a couple doors and lights. Because the area was so big, the Testificates began to... um... OVER populate.These little buggers reproduced the village so fast that I couldn't keep up and soon they were overflowing out of buildings. Mob attacks couldn't keep up with the rate they were repopulating, and the iron golems that kept spawning (for every 15 villager a new one spawns) made
Free Artists Network F.A.N.: Free Artists Network: Diverse Art Education for Creative Students The Free Artists Network (FAN) is designed to modernize the field of art education, making art lessons more relevant to industry-standard skills and making content easier to access for a broader range of students worldwide. FAN aims to establish an international database of art lessons in various media modalities. These lessons will be contributed by other art educators, industry professionals, and software developers and will offer creative students industry-relevant lessons that meet their own diverse artistic interests, ability levels, and/or special needs. Teachers can upload their own multi-media art lessons to this database to share them with art students and other art educators worldwide. Features Include, but are not limite
CI Halloween 2012 members voting rulesTrick or TreatWritten by: Tsuki-SoraRukiEdited by:Hello,dear membersThis was CI's second Halloween contest,all the polls has been made so you can start voting ^^you can vote till next Wednesday3 entries of each poll will go to the next round of the voting★voting poll 1★ ★voting poll 2★ ★voting poll 3★ ★voting pol 4l★ ★voting poll 5★ ★voting poll 6★
H.O.W. 5-THEME FANART CONTEST (CHARITY EVENT)It's a bit earlier than expected, but Hell with it!Organized by :iconFallenangelgm:Judges: :iconFallenAngelGM: & :iconHaganenochibisan:WHAT IS IT ABOUT?A fanart contest with the characters of our manga project HEART OF WILDFIRE with the themes of:HORROR – WEDDING – MUSIC – SPORTS – FANTASY & MYTHSAND THE PRIZES? The prizes will 5 SUPER GROUP SUBS that will be given to 5 groups on DeviantArt of the winners’ choice.- One of the prizes can’t be won twice by a group, so one SUPER GROUP SUB by group.- It can’t be given to yourself, the prize MUST be for someone else’s group (It is a CHARITY contest).- FOR GROUP FOUNDERS & CO-FOUNDERS, YOU CAN SPREAD THE WORD THROUGH YOUR GROUP IF YOU’D LIKE TO GET A “SUPER GROUP” SUBSNUMBER OF ENTRIES & DEADLINE- There are no limit of entries. It’s unlimited- Deadline: JUNE 1ST, 2013 AT 11H59PM (GMT -5H00)GUIDELINE
Kony 2012I've gotten a lot of requests to talk about this, which coincidentally happened right along side my two political cartoons taking off like wild fire. Dunno if it was an accident or bad timing, but right now it seems like everyone wants me to talk about Kony... which I honestly don't know why because I'm not a journalist and everyone else is making such a big deal about it I don't know what else I could offer to the discussion other than "yup, this is going on, check out the links."
Now keep in mind this next bit will be very scarce in details because I still haven't been able to muster up enough facts and everyone else seems to already know so much, so I apologize if it's a bit condensed.Who is Kony?The LRA (Lord's Resistance Army) is a religious militant group which operates in several countries including Uganda, Sudan, and the Central African Republic. Formed in 1987 they gained prominence and attention for their extremist atrocities committed against civilians and ch
Night Dreams WinnersBefore I announce the winners, its has been brought to my attention that some of you have been pestering your watchers to vote for you.. THIS IS NOT FAIR..These Contests are for our members only! Not for all of Deviantart.. Especially the voting process!! When we do the "note voting" I try to check to see if those I'm receiving a note from are really members.. (sometimes that is impossible with 33 notes a day) What I really do NOT like is when you ask your watchers to vote on OUR polls because unfortunately.. you do not have to be a member to vote in our polls and I have no way of see who is voting... I want these contests to be fair to everyone in our Group.. therefore in future contests.. anyone caught trying to get their watchers to vote for them will be automatically disqualified from our contest.Now Here are your Winners!!:iconsparklesplz::iconsparklylaplz:First Place:iconsparklylaplz::iconsparklesplz::iconsopic84::devsopic84:withF
Snow Day.Yaaaaay! Snow day! Snow day! I don't have to go to w.....AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAW, DAMNIT!*works from home*