Teenage Alien Ninja Turtles

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I've just learned that filmmaker Michael Bay (aka - Uwe-Boll-With-A-Budget) has turned his withering gaze upon the Heroes in a Half-Shell, and has set about mutilating the franchise by informing us that their origin will change in his upcoming (oh god; if I have to refer to another film as this I may start weeping blood) reboot.

Y'know in the Disney animation Bolt where the idiot pigeons give a one-word pitch at how to "improve" the series that the titular doggie has absconded from? It's a dig at crappy writers that have no idea how to come up with an original idea and so just shoehorn in absurd new story elements to an existing tale.
Well; that's basically what Mr Bay has said:

"Aliens".

Nope. They're not mutants anymore. They're aliens.

After Transformers: This should be buried on the dark side of the Moon (or whatever it was called), I vowed never to piss away my money or, more importantly; my time, watching any future film Bay is connected with.
This news kinda reinforces my resolve!

Why the hell aren't they making a follow up to the ace 2007 TMNT film? It was brilliant and fit perfectly into the canon, essentially picking up from where the earlier live-action films had left off but telling its story so well that it wasn't actually required that you had seen them.
It built upon the mythology, adding to it.

Bay, on the other hand, is just squatting over it, preparing to give it a good pebble-dash.
© 2012 - 2024 jollyjack
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zigzag563's avatar
Hey, did you see that leaked concept art for the film?
I'm pretty sure ninjas aren't supposed to be wearing heavy battle armor and using axes and maces.
:iconwthewwplz: